Missed mark
Most everyone has a black spot in his or her memories,something you don't want to be known, something you would like to forget but you can't, it comes back,it hits you periodicaly and when you don't expect it at all.
It's 4:58 in the morning in southern France and as I was watching flames in the fire place 15mn ago, it came to the surface once again,biting hard into my heart......Well, here it is:
I'm out for the night,I'm sixteen,I prowl around the french quarter on saturday night.I'm horny
as a deer in mating season,it's hot in New Orleans and summer is not far ahead.After checking out a few booze joints and night clubs in the french quarter I decide to go to " El café of los marinayos"(I'm not sure about the spelling) near Jackson's square,down by the river's side.
They didn't ask for ID's and didn't give a damn about your age (worry free for a teen under 18).
While drinking tequila and listening to latin music I was involved in a conversation with a guy that introduced me to an under-nourished brunette with nice eyes(can't remember how this happened but it did)to make the story short she refused the drink I was offering her and proposed to put up for five bucks(cheap even in those days), I said yes and out we went.
We ended up in a place were they rented tiny and worn out rooms for the night.
After our performance(nothing worth Guiness Book's attention) I started to dress up to go,
that's when she asked me to stay a while with her.....and I refused.
Lord! There's no time-travel machine to go back to you girl,if there was, I'd go back indeed and I
would stay and caress your hair and hold you against me telling you sweet lies, I'm so sorry.
I was such a cold hearted bastard.
If you're still alive and if you still remember that night, please forgive me,I ask for mercy because you see; now it's me burning in hell.
It's 4:58 in the morning in southern France and as I was watching flames in the fire place 15mn ago, it came to the surface once again,biting hard into my heart......Well, here it is:
I'm out for the night,I'm sixteen,I prowl around the french quarter on saturday night.I'm horny
as a deer in mating season,it's hot in New Orleans and summer is not far ahead.After checking out a few booze joints and night clubs in the french quarter I decide to go to " El café of los marinayos"(I'm not sure about the spelling) near Jackson's square,down by the river's side.
They didn't ask for ID's and didn't give a damn about your age (worry free for a teen under 18).
While drinking tequila and listening to latin music I was involved in a conversation with a guy that introduced me to an under-nourished brunette with nice eyes(can't remember how this happened but it did)to make the story short she refused the drink I was offering her and proposed to put up for five bucks(cheap even in those days), I said yes and out we went.
We ended up in a place were they rented tiny and worn out rooms for the night.
After our performance(nothing worth Guiness Book's attention) I started to dress up to go,
that's when she asked me to stay a while with her.....and I refused.
Lord! There's no time-travel machine to go back to you girl,if there was, I'd go back indeed and I
would stay and caress your hair and hold you against me telling you sweet lies, I'm so sorry.
I was such a cold hearted bastard.
If you're still alive and if you still remember that night, please forgive me,I ask for mercy because you see; now it's me burning in hell.
posted by GPV at 7:28 PM
2 Comments:
That is very poignant what you wrote, and a very human story. Aren't we all haunted by spectres like this, of the pain we caused, often unintentionally, but now we realize.
Glad I stopped by. I've missed reading you. And thanks also for looking in at indetermnacy. It's hard to get posting regularly again, but I'm trying.
Sugar, don't worry. It just wasn't meant to be. Maybe by going you prevented something bad from happening.
Kisses!
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